wherein I had a change of plans
it's about time I come clean. I am NOT the social, outgoing, fun person I pretend to be. I am actually quite the opposite. I'm a homebody. I don't like surprises, and trying new things is really NOT my cup o' tea.
last night I was supposed to go meet up with some local bloggers for dinner up in Bellevue. some of these gals I have met before, and some I have not. some I really like, and some I just haven't gotten to know.
at the last minute I chickened out. I don't know why. I decided I didn't want to drive ALL the way to Bellevue (too far from home?). I worried that I would feel like I didn't belong (I am about 10 years older than the group). it just brought back memories of high school and always wanting to fit in with the "in crowd", although I AM a grown up now, and I DO realize that there really is no such thing as the "in crowd."
so I bailed at the last minute, and went on a much needed date with my hubby (which is a whole other story), but now I'm full of regret. regret that I am NOT that other Rachel, the one who will go anywhere, do anything at the drop of a hat. the one who doesn't get filled with anxiety at the silliest things.
this is me. take it or leave it.